My Tireless Retirement - Week 210

 

Spring is my favorite season and I am enjoying it so much right now.  The temperatures are on the rise, trees are leafing out, things are blooming and my yard is filled with colorful tulips and daffodils.  I absolutely love this time of year as the earth is waking up and filled with life.  My walks to and from the bus are keeping me feeling light and invigorated as every day there is something new to see and admire.

 

This past week I spent a great deal of time outdoors in the yard and making preparations for my gardening projects.  I am only a month away from the bulk of my planting and I am starting to get a little bit excited about it.  As I’ve mentioned before I am not much of a gardener, but I want to keep trying.  I have raised garden beds that have been amended and turned once already and I’m hoping the earthworms have been busy doing their job as well.

 

I worked all day Friday, Monday (the TTO took the day off) and then again on Tuesday taking a large group of seniors on a picnic and to a hot springs.  Now I am in the midst of a long five day weekend and thoroughly enjoying the time off.  Taking more time off, now that spring is here, and with summer up ahead, is a big priority for me so I can enjoy my retired life and do more of the things I dreamed about doing in retirement.

 

Saturday was an absolutely gorgeous, sunny day with temperatures reaching the high sixties.  In preparation of Easter Sunday I baked a Hot Milk Cake that day, made some deviled eggs and a macaroni salad to go with the London broil I marinated and grilled the next day.  It was nice to have a few things made up ahead of time so Easter was more relaxed and enjoyable.  I love to use this cake any time I make shortcake.  I used last year’s rhubarb and some frozen strawberries to make a compote to top the cake and then some whipped cream.  Strawberry shortcake is truly the taste of spring, in my opinion.

 

In the afternoon I walk to the bus stop and rode down to Albertson’s just to pick up two jars of my favorite blue cheese salad dressing.  It was on a special offer as part of my rewards card so I didn’t want to pass that up.  Right now this is the only salad dressing I purchase at the store as I make my own from scratch most of the time.  I also picked up five packages of Knorr pasta sides and five of the Knorr rice sides on sale for 10/$10.  When I got home I added them to my emergency/camp/donation shelf.

 

Easter was a wonderful day spent alone and relaxing.  The only task to tick off my list was to wash all of my bedding and give my bedroom a bit of a spring clean.  I prepared my holiday dinner and it was so good.  I watched TV later on and reflected as I wrote in my journal.  Life is very good, for the most part, and I am incredibly grateful.  Despite life’s challenges I will continue to thrive.

 

Wednesday I walked down to the bank to take care of some financial business and then walked back home.  The weather was perfect for a morning walk with plenty of sunshine.  I propped the back door open later that day opened the windows to let in the fresh air while I puttered about the house and yard.  Thursday was much the same.

 

To save money last week I did not turn on the heat at all, not even the fireplace was needed.  I didn’t need to drive anywhere and took advantage of public transportation and walked to get where I needed to go as gas prices rose yet again another 20¢ per gallon.  I kept my spending to a minimum and did a lot to secure my financial future.  It was a very good week!

 

Do What Makes YOU Happy

 

I love sharing parts of my life and what I do in retirement with all of you.  In no way do I expect you will think like me or do things like I do.  We are all different, which is the beautiful part of life.  If we were all the same I think it would make things very dull.  I heartily encourage you to do what makes you happy.

 

What makes me happy would probably bore the hell out of most people.  I love to economize and live a thrifty and resourceful lifestyle.  I love to cook my own food.  I love home canning projects.  I love having and maintaining a long term food storage.  I thrive in that with meal planning, meal prepping, researching recipes and looking for grocery deals.  In fact, the only shopping I truly enjoy and look forward to is going to the grocery store.  I also enjoy a good budget challenge.

 

I love to do things for myself as much as I possibly can.  I am weird enough to enjoy working on my own car, changing the oil and doing minor repairs.  I thoroughly enjoy home improvement projects and making repairs.  I think it is fun to grab a chainsaw and trim a tree.  I’m not very good at landscaping, but I do enjoy trying.

 

Not everyone enjoys camping or hiking, but I sure do.  I love wading in an icy cold river or creek and smelling like a campfire when I climb into my sleeping bag at night.  Fresh air and exercise is like tonic to me.  I crave sunshine, mountains and the smell of pine trees.

 

I love to sew and do a variety of craft projects.  Paper crafting and making my own greeting cards, day planners, journals and even bookmarks fills me with pure joy.  Creativity is my therapy and a huge part of what I do on a regular basis.  I love to make things that are pretty and useful.

 

Another thing that fills my tank is service work.  I have really enjoyed my part time job working with seniors, taking them on adventures, pouring them a cup of coffee or just listening when they need someone to talk to.  Donating to the food bank and providing food and other items to people in need is also a high priority for me.  I am grateful to be able to be of service to others.

 

I like to keep a clean, tidy, well organized and uncluttered home.  I am constantly cleaning and decluttering while I work to streamline my processes and make them more efficient.  With that comes peace and tranquility.  It may not be for everyone, some enjoy being surrounded by more stuff, but for me I find that less is much more calming.

 

It is important to do what makes each of us happy.  It is also important that we are all able to do these things unencumbered and without criticism.  Likewise, we need to allow others to do what makes them happy without passing judgment or being critical.  We are all different and that is completely okay.  Do what makes YOU happy.

 

My Simple Thrifty Closet

 

Four years into my retirement journey I am so very happy with my decision early on to downsize and simplify my wardrobe.  I keep a limited number of items and it makes it so easy to choose what I want to wear and get myself dressed each day.  My wardrobe is setup to be multi-seasonal meaning I start out with the basics and in cooler weather I simply add layers.  Super easy, no fuss, no stress!  Love, love, love it!

 

My closet in my bedroom runs the entire length of one wall and has a section of shelving to act as a linen closet.  Several years ago I took down the original closet rod with overhead shelf and built in a closet organizer system with rods at various heights, additional shelves and a set of drawers which eliminated my need to have a dresser in my room.  It made for so much more efficient and usable space.

 

My routine has been to purchase one entire new outfit each year, a pair of athletic shoes and a new bra.  I also plan for replacing any worn out underwear, sleepwear and socks.  Once I’ve made these purchases I pull out anything that is worn out or is something I no longer enjoy wearing and toss or donate those items as is appropriate.

 

Downstairs in my laundry room I keep a shoe organizer that holds the shoes I wear the most.  I also keep a bin to hold my socks so they are handy when I get ready to put my shoes on to leave the house.  Above the shoe rack is the coat rack where I hang my jacket, backpack (I don’t use a purse anymore) and my lanyards holding my keys and work ID.

 

In the hall closet I hang my winter coats.  They don’t get a lot of use as our weather is rarely that cold so these items don’t need to be on the coat rack in the laundry room much.  It is nice to have this space to keep them since they are bulkier and take up more space.  These coats will last me for years, to be sure, so I have no plans to purchase replacements any time soon.

 

Having a simplified wardrobe has not just saved my sanity but it also saves me a lot of time and money because I hardly shop for clothing at all.  For me that is a true blessing because I am one that really doesn’t enjoy clothes shopping.  Another unexpected bonus of a simplified wardrobe is how much it has streamlined my laundry process.  I typically get by just running a load of clothes about every six or seven days, I can get it all done in a short amount of time and I save on both the electric and water bill, not to mention, my laundry supplies last so much longer too  Win-win!.

 

New Recipes! Salisbury Steak & Carrot Potato Mash

 

Homemade Salisbury Steak is one of those meals that is perfect for Sunday dinner, company or as an option for meal prepping.  I’ve made it a variety of ways over the years, but my most favorite is like this.

 

I finely chop up some onions and button mushrooms to mix into a pound of lean ground beef along with some garlic, salt & pepper, Worcestershire sauce and dried parsley.  

Once I’ve combined all of these things into the meat until it is well incorporated I evenly divide the mixture into four portions to pat out into patties.  

I let them sit until the meat is room temperature and then pan fry them until each side begins to brown.  

I remove them from the pan to rest and then in the remaining drippings I sauté some sliced mushrooms.  Once the mushrooms are done I sprinkle a heaping teaspoon of flour over the top and then stir and cook the flour for about a minute before pouring in two cups of beef broth.  

I love to stir in a tablespoon of dry au jus from a packet into the broth to boost the flavor. 

I will stir it until it begins to bubble and thicken.  

The patties go back into the gravy and simmer for about ten minutes.  Be sure to add in all the yummy juices too.

 

I love to serve Salisbury steak with my favorite mashed potatoes.  

I boil three or four peeled and cubed russet potatoes along with a peeled and sliced up carrot.  

Once they are fork tender I drain and mash the vegetables adding in a few tablespoons of butter and some whole milk to the perfect consistency.  

Perfect for meal prepping!

Then I serve them alongside the steak with gravy over the top.  Scrumptious!

 

My Tireless Retirement - Week 209

 

Hello my friends!  It was a lovely and very busy week for me.  I worked, I did some canning, I went to the No Kings Rally, I meal prepped, I ran errands, I hung out with a friend, I celebrated my 4^th Anniversary in retirement and I worked outside in the yard.  I feel very accomplished!

 

It felt really good to spend some quality time in my kitchen this past week.  I canned beef and chicken for my LTFS shelf and also some taco meat.  I even had enough taco meat leftover to make myself a nice taco salad.  Salads have been a big part of my meal plan lately as the weather is warming up.

 

I was able to leave the heating off all week and still feel very comfortable, even in the early morning hours when it is chilly outside.  Later in the day I was able to open windows for fresh air, which I absolutely love.  When I propped the back door open last weekend Stella was kind enough to bring a near dead mouse into the house.  Sadly for her, I promptly exited her houseguest.  She wasn’t very happy with me.

 

I worked Friday, Monday and Tuesday.  Wednesday and Thursday were spent canning and getting caught up on household tasks.  I also managed to get outside between rain showers and pull some weeds.  I cannot believe how prolific the milkweeds are this year, but the chickens are sure enjoying them.

 

It was a super awesome week this past week filled with a variety of different tasks and experiences.  I am super grateful for all I was able to.  What were you able to accomplish?

 

Narcissism

 

Narcissism is a personality disorder (NPD) that affects nearly one in six individuals meaning that we encounter people with NPD far more often than we might realize.  For the most part these encounters are fairly benign, but for some of us they are far more impactful.

 

I was raised by a narcissist, have worked with narcissists at various times throughout my career and had the misfortune (luck of the draw) of raising a narcissist.  Being raised by, and having raised, a narcissist is the most difficult thing to wrap one’s head around because of how much you love them.  Despite everything my parent put me through during my childhood and well into adulthood I still love that person very much.  However, despite my best efforts, even with the help of a therapist, that relationship ended about fifteen years ago.

 

Having a child with NPD is the hardest because you love them so much and you know that they will struggle their entire lives to navigate their way while they leave a wake of emotional destruction in their path.  Upheaval they don’t intend, broken relationships, missed opportunities and difficulties getting along with others are often their future.  Even harder is the fact that there is nothing you can to do to help them or fix it and you have to accept that.

 

I have found this book tremendously helpful

Radical acceptance is the only way to survive NPD, but once you do you are able to effectively move forward with clarity, understanding and the tools to love and deal with that person.  It is a lot of work, but it is possible.  Having a good therapist with NPD experience is extremely helpful.

 

When you work with someone with NPD you have options.  You can either gather the tools and use techniques to be able to work with them and accept all the bumps along the way or you can change jobs and get away from them.  Because of the varying degrees of NPD, moving along and changing jobs is typically the only way to survive a narcissist in the workplace.  Family members and spouses however, make it much harder.  That is where professional help becomes even more important.

 

Narcissists can be absolutely brutal.  They are highly manipulative and emotionally abusive.  Some are physically abusive too.  One thing I can tell you is that dealing with and recovering from NPD abuse requires outside professional help.  It really isn’t something we can do on our own.  You also need clarity about what narcissism really is.  Once you have clarity you are better able to make practical decisions.  From there you can also begin to heal.

 

It is completely okay to say “I can’t continue to be in this situation anymore”.  It is completely okay to maintain minimal contact.  It is also completely okay to accept our limitations and to walk away if that is what needs to happen.  It is okay too, to still love that person.  It is hard, very hard, but at the end of the day we need to make sure we don’t sacrifice ourselves.  We need to make to love ourselves too.  I will all my best to those of you that find yourselves in this same situation.